Against All Odds? Or because of them?

We humans are very particular. We want somethings and wish to avoid others. We know this. But we are also very poor at determining which actions will result in which fruits.

We often have an idea of what we want, be it an object, friend or circumstance. We feel that our desire is somehow deeply valid. So automatically valid in fact, that we don’t even check to see how valid or realistic it may be. We might chose something grandiose or something very specific based on an ideal or set of values. Our wants may even be tied to what we have been told we should be engendering or manifesting in our lives in order to be called normal or successful.

But what really leads to accomplishment? For most people, accomplishment ripens from two basic factors coming together over time. The first is an idea of what we wish for. Let us call this the view. This view must normally be accompanied by a method to get there. In some way, we can say that the heaven in our minds (our goals or idea of heaven) and Earth (the realties of this world, must somehow come together to yield what we want.

It is relatively rare that simple luck or randomness brings us what we wish for. Also, despite the fact that we rationally know we may need to work hard and with great consistency to make something happen a certain way, we don’t want adversity or resistance along the way. We find adversity to be basically against us and a block in our path to reaching our goals. But when examined closely, this is not the case. Most famous people who “made it against all odds” actually made it because of all the odds being stacked against them. Dealing with the things that got in the way were precisely the things needed for success.

I will give one simple if not silly example of my own. For some reason, although not seeing myself to be someone with any level of stamina or speed, I was asked to join a college relay race. It was more of a fun event rather than an official college contest. The loop was about 3/4 of a mile. There were six teams and I believe six people on each team. I was the last to run for my team and we were in last place. I took the baton thinking, I will do my best and since we are in last place and the chances are low, I wont feel bad if we dont't win. I thought that if I can pass even one or two, my team would at least end in a better position. It happened that the next team’s runner was somehow almost within my reach and I was encouraged to at least pass one team. So I did. This placed the next team’s runner just slightly out of reach. I thought, “well, I might as well try”. So, I passed him also. Each time I passed an opposing team member, the next one was just equally and seemingly out of my reach but close enough to make me feel there was some chance if I really tried hard. Before I knew what had happened, I had passed five teams’ runners and I came across the finish winning the race for our team. Yes, I had pushed myself far past any reasonable limit and thought I might in fact just die right on the spot. One great step for the team, required silly small steps from an individual. The point is that adversity made me the winner not the lack of good odds.

This same story can be seen, again and again in many famous people’s lives. They embraced their goals so completely that the obstacles were usually framed as stepping stones to the goal.

Now suppose you were an olympic athlete and you had a coach that kept saying things like: “You’re great! Wow, you are so fast!” Or maybe: “There’s nobody like you!”??? You may feel really good about the coach but for sure that is a coach nobody needs. The coach is not there to make you love the coach. Like this, the Tantric Guru places challenges in front of the student and doesn’t really see much advantage in massaging the student’s ego. A student may in fact feel fairly unsure nearly their entire journey. There are many types and personalities of teachers also. Some are very sweet outwardly or perhaps in the early days of a student teacher relation. My own teacher was fairly cryptic in his responses to my activities. I very rarely experienced any praise whatsoever for my entire life. And when I was praised I was either suspicious or simply felt that the praise was irrelevant since only death could be the ultimate test of my practice.

So next time you feel sorry for yourself having to face obstacles, remember this. Decide how badly you want or need whatever you are seeking and then realize that anything and everything that tries to stop you is the way through to your goal. Normally, the way around them is to go through them. This especially applies to the Tantric Buddhist path. When you practice and upheavals arise in one’s mind or in one’s body or in one’s external world, consider that the practice is working to ripen you stuff into a form that can be dealt with. In other words, your practice is working. If on the other hand you come out of a super short 3 day retreat feeling: “Oh how blissful, my practice has elevated me into the realm of the Dakinis”, better go back in until you perceive the really wrathful Dakini coach’s face. If you are not being purged, you may be being fooled.

And when you see your Guru and they seem grumpy or seem to ignore you or don’t prostrate to you because you made material offerings to them, instead of throwing a hissy fit, try to remember what you signed on for and ask yourself, “What would I do to help someone get over their samsaric propensities? Would I give their egos a massage? or would I mess with their conceptions?” In the west, a Guru that seems irritable, abrasive or uninterested, is called annoying. In Asia, when a Guru causes your emotions to rise up and forces you to face your mind without exit, they are called extremely kind.

Unrepayable kindness. Always remember the Lama.

This was written by a grumpy Lama dressed up in a white skirt who tries not to scare people away but fails at that part of the job. May all beings recognize the coach-like aspect of the Lama, obstacles and enemies and reach the citadel in this very life.